Dandelions and Graduation

Every year in the spring, when I first start having to mow the yard again, I’m always reminded of something that my Grandpa Steidl used to say.  “If dandelions were hard to grow, people would want them in their yards.” I find this saying to have meaning on several different levels.  First, I think it could mean that although most people think of dandelions as a weed, they are a flower and do have beauty.

However, I think that another meaning is that part of the value and beauty of a flower is that it takes time and a lot of effort to cultivate.  A rose is considered more beautiful and valuable than a flower because it doesn’t generally just grow on its own.  You have to nurture it and work for it.  I think this is true of many things.  When you have to work for them, you appreciate them more.

This is where graduation comes in.  Yesterday was the last day of the school year for the sixth grade students at our school.  It was honestly a very emotional day for me.  As I said goodbye to many children that I’ve taught since they were in the first grade.  They are like flowers.  It took a lot of work, a lot of time, and a lot of energy to get them to bloom.  I saw them grow from tiny little six year old kids to almost teenagers.  Many of our students come to us not even knowing the alphabet.  To see them grow from that to being independent readers and writing full five paragraph essays is a true joy.

It’s always a bittersweet moment at “graduation.” (I know that they’re sixth graders and it’s not actually graduation).  On one hand, it’s really sad to see them go.  On the other hand, I take pride in the feeling of accomplishment as they walk out the door prepared for seventh grade and hopefully prepared in some respects for the rest of their lives.

Teacher Interview – Ellyn Lykins

Hey Everyone!  So it’s been almost two weeks since I last posted on here.  The reason for that is that we’re now in the middle of something known as testing season.  Theologically, I’m not sure what I believe about the concept of purgatory.  However, if there is such a place, then any teacher sent there will spend their time doing nothing but proctoring standardized tests until they have received penance for their sins…or until 85% of the class has tested at a proficient level. Either way, it can be as soul draining as it is time consuming.  However, in the midst of all that, Ellyn Lykins took the time to be the subject of the next teacher interview.  I found her responses to the questions to be thoughtful, heartfelt, and passionate.  I want to start by thanking her so much for spending her precious time doing this.  Enjoy this insight into an amazing and passionate teacher.

Erik – First of all, thanks so much for taking the time to do this.  I know that now we’re in the middle of testing season (an unfortunate reality for us these days) and you’re probably really busy but it means a lot.

Erik – Can you start by just giving a history of your teaching experience?  Like where you’ve worked and in what grades?

Ellyn – For one year after college, I worked for Americorps as a literacy program specialist and tutor in neighborhood centers on the East side of Cleveland. During that time, I worked with mostly elementary and middle school students. The next year, I worked as a high school English teacher in a private school serving 9th-12th grade students with Autism. Currently, I am teaching 7th-grade language arts for my fourth year at Visintainer Middle School in Brunswick. I’ve liked working with all age groups for different reasons, but 7th graders are especially awesome!

Erik – Do you have any plans for the rest of your career?  Do you plan to continue teaching or do you think you might want to go into admin at some point?

Ellyn – As of this year, I cannot see myself working in a setting that doesn’t involve being in the classroom and working directly with students. I have considered going back to get a license in administration, but I cannot honestly imagine being a principal. It seems really stressful, and I don’t think I’d sleep at night. Plus, I feel most fulfilled when I’m teaching; time is irrelevant when I’m in the middle of a good lesson.

Erik – What inspired you to be a teacher in the first place?  Is there any kind of a story there?

Ellyn – There is no “aha” moment for me. I can’t say that teaching was something I knew I was going to do growing up. Most of teenage years, I wanted to become a hairstylist. When I started at OU, I declared my major to be East Asian Studies. Sometime during my sophomore year, I decided to take a teaching course, then soon chose to teach English because it seemed like the best option. I’m not really sure why I chose to pursue teaching, but I do remember thinking many of my teachers growing up were the happiest adults. They were people I wanted to emulate.

Erik – Who were some of the teachers that really had an impact on your life when you were in school?  Why do you think they had that impact?

Ellyn – Elaine Taylor was my art teacher at Medina High School. I am friends with her on Facebook now, so she may see this! I always wanted to be in her classroom. Even if I had a study hall, I would find a way to spend it in her room working on my art projects. It was my happy place. She created an environment that was warm and comfortable; I felt like I could be myself. Likewise, Pat Werger, my art teacher from A.I. Root Middle School, was incredible. I remember thinking of her as my teacher but also thinking she was the coolest adult ever. She had so many interests that she shared with us, and she embraced everyone’s weirdness. I always wanted to be in her classroom, too. If I wasn’t a language arts teacher, I’d want to be an art teacher. I also remember my 7th-grade team of teachers at A.I. Root Middle School. The teachers were fun and energetic, but more importantly, they seemed to really like being at school everyday. It was my favorite year of school. Oddly enough, I am now a 7th-grade teacher, and I hope my students think that I like being at school!

Erik – What are some of your best memories as a teacher so far?  Are there any students you’ve had that stand out specifically?

Ellyn – I will never forget the students that I worked with at the school for Autism. That was my first year with my own classroom, and I only had 14 students, so I got to know them all very well. Many of the students had been removed from their home school districts. The school was– in a sense– a last resort for them. They needed supportive adults in their lives so badly, and I wanted to support them in every way I could. During my time at Visintainer Middle School, I have had so many experiences with students that I will cherish forever. Language arts is a special subject to teach because I get to talk about so many interesting aspects of life with students all the time. This year will be memorable to me; it is the first year I have really slowed down enough to enjoy the little moments with the kids. In previous years, I was working on (and stressing over) many new teacher requirements. Now I realize that I’m helping kids grow up which is an awesome privilege, and I have to treasure it!

Erik – We’re now about six weeks away from summer break.  Any big plans?

Ellyn – Usually over summer break, I take on extra jobs (tutoring, babysitting, etc). This is the first year I will not be doing that! I am very excited to be going on a trip to Norway with my husband, my brother, and sister-in-law at the beginning of June. I am also signed up to take tennis lessons! My goal is to master the art of relaxing more so than I have in the past. Last summer (and pretty much my whole life), I have constantly felt the need to be busy. To encourage myself to relax, I’m going to buy a hammock.

Erik – I’ve found a lot of times that teachers always have a lot of side projects going on like writing, art, music, crafting, being a teacher-author on teacherspayteachers.com, etc.  Do you have any of those?

Ellyn – At the moment, I don’t have any side projects going on other than trip planning. I would consider that a hobby. I have written and shared pieces of writing a few times in the past, and it is something that I’d like to keep doing. I’ve also done some freelance editing. Writing is definitely a passion for me. You also mentioned teacherspayteachers.com. I have thought about submitting curriculum materials to the website many times. I think this summer I may submit a few! Why not?

Out of the mouth of babes

In, “Attack of the Clones,” the second episode of the Star Wars saga, Master Yoda says, “Truly wonderful, the mind of a child is.”  In my six years of teaching, I have found that Master Yoda is absolutely correct in this.  At times, children think so simplistically, while at the same time employing fantastical imaginations.  Either way, the results are almost always entertaining.  Take our three year old son Joshua for example.  I forget what exactly prompted him to say this, but the other day I was doing something where I was standing between him and the television.  He looks at me and says, “Come on come on, just sit down ya old man.” It took me off guard so much I just burst out in laughter.  I have no idea where he heard that.  Here are some other times from this week when kids have just said some of the strangest or funniest stuff to me.

The other day, I was buckling Joshua and Izaiah in the van.  Izaiah looked at me and said, “No daddy, I just want to hang on this time.”  I looked at him and said, “Izaiah, let’s just make it a rule that whenever we’re in the van driving, you just “hanging on” is not really an option ok buddy?”

Today in first grade one of the boys walked up to me and said, “Mr. Steidl, can I go to the bathroom?  I really have to poop.  I farted twice already and I think the other kids can smell it.”

One of our first graders stole another one’s Lunchable and had it in his desk.  It was the one with crackers, meat, and cheese.  He had already opened it and assembled a few of the little sandwiches (it was about 9:30 in the morning mind you).  When confronted, he said he shouldn’t get in trouble because he hadn’t actually eaten any of the crackers yet.

My first graders know that my bald spot itches whenever I eat something really spicy.  So now, any time I reach up to scratch my bald spot they ask me if I’m eating anything spicy.  I’m like, “No, I’ve been standing in front of you talking for 45 minutes.  Have you seen me eat anything spicy?”

Our morning discussion question was “If you had a robot and could program it to do anything, what would you do with it?”  We had some great answers.

Student – “I would have it take me to Mexico.”  Me – “Do you speak Spanish?”  Student – “No.”  Me – “Then why would you want it to take you to Mexico?”  Student – “So I could go shopping.”  Me – “You just want to go shopping in Mexico?”  Student – “Yes.”  Me – “….ok.”

“I would make it dab…and beat up my sister.”

“I would have it transform into dirt bikes and race cars and stuff…..and feed me apples.  I really like apples.”

“I just want it to play video games with me.”

“I would have it bring all my dolls to life to have a tea party with me.”

Student – “I would have it turn my lights off for me.”  Me – “That’s all you want it to do?  You can program it to do anything.”  Student – “Yeah, sometimes I get in bed and forget to turn my lights off.  I hate that.”  Me – “Ok…you know that they already have this thing that you just clap your hands and it turns the lights off.” (Five students clap their hands) “Well we don’t have one in here…but they do have them.”  (Disappointed sighs)  They spent the rest of the day clapping in each room they went into to see if that room had the clap off lights.  They were sorely disappointed each time.

We read this book in first grade by Eric Carle called, The Tiny Seed.  In it, one of the flowers gets picked by a boy who gives it to a girl.  Well, the book says that he gives it to a friend.  Of course when the kids sawthat it’s a boy giving a flower to a girl they all yelled “Eeeewwww.” One girl in the front row turned around and said “No guys they’re just friends” (Air quotes as she says just friends).  Then she winked and they all yelled, “Eeeeeewwwww!!!!” even louder.

I made the mistake of telling a knock knock joke to the kindergarten kids at lunch.  There is nothing worse than 15 min of kindergarteners making up their own knock knock jokes…except 20 min of them making up their own knock knock jokes.  That would be worse.  Here were some of them.

Knock Knock.  Who’s there?  Chicken nuggets and super stackers.  Chicken nuggets and super stackers who? (blank stare looking at me then) …….IT’S YOU!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHA!!! They all laughed uproariously.  I didn’t get it.

Knock knock.  Who’s there?  Mr. Steidl.  Mr. Steidl who?  ……IT’S YOU!!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHA!!!  Same punchline.  I still didn’t get it.

Finally I made one up.  Knock knock.  Who’s there?  Mr. Steidl.  Mr. Steidl who?  Mr. Steidl who doesn’t want to hear any more knock knock jokes! BAHAHAHA!!!!…. now they didn’t get it.

But yeah.  That was my day today.

 

 

Things I say

I have several goals for myself as a teacher.  I want to prepare my students academically, emotionally, and socially for the rest of their lives.  I want to provide them with a safe environment both physically and emotionally while they’re here.  I want them to leave my classroom simply as a better person than when they walked in.  However, one of the things for which I strive, as I think we all do, is to simply be someone that they remember.

There are several schools of thought on this.  First, there’s the cliche that “Students won’t remember everything you taught them but they will always remember how you made them feel.”  So for this, I do try to always provide a welcoming environment in which the students feel safe and accepted.  However, I have found that one of the things that the students remember most about me is the quirky things that I say.  My first year, when I was coaching the basketball team, to get them to stop talking so we could coach, I would yell “Lock it up and take a knee!”  Just last year, I saw one of my old basketball players and he quite literally asked me if I still told kids to lock it up.  I’m proud to say I do.  However, I just say and do a lot of quirky things to try to keep the classroom fun and entertaining and keep the students engaged.  I think overall, if ten years from now, students look back and think, “Man, Mr. Steidl was probably a little bit legitimately insane!”  I’ll be ok with that.  So, without further ado, here are some of the weird things I say.

When a student tells me that they don’t want to do something I usually reply with, “Well I don’t want donuts to make me fat.  But I eat plenty of them and, well….”

When a student asks a question that I really just don’t want or need to take the time to answer I say, “Oh yeah, that is a nunya.” or “Oh yeah that belongs to nunya” or “Oh she was talking to nunya.”  Then when they say “Who’s nunya?” or “What’s a nunya?” I say “Nunya business!!! BAHAHAHA.” and walk away.  I also do the same thing with the word minejone.  As in “Minejone business!!!!”

Sometimes I’ll pronounce words wrong on purpose.  Like I’ll say soicle instead of circle.  For example, “Soicle all the fractions that are equivalent to 1/2.” Kids look at me weird and I say, “I can’t say the word circle so I have to say soicle instead.” They usually yell, “But you just said “Circle!!”” And I’ll act like I’m hurt and say, “Now you guys are just teasing me.  I literally cannot physically pronounce the word, “circle,” so I have to say, “soicle.”

When kids say “OH MY GOD!!!” like complaining that I’m telling them to go back to their seats or something, I say “No, I’m Mr. Steidl, not God, but I think He’d agree with me on this.  Go back to your seat.”

When kids disagree with something like not being able to just get up and go to the bathroom whenever they want, I’ll say, “Too bad, so sad, glad your mad.  That’s rhyming. And that lesson is free of charge.  You’re welcome.  Now sit down.”

I am proud to say that I have taught an entire 30 minute lecture in an Irish accent.

When kids hug each other in the hall I’ll say, “Stop! Nope! Nope! Nope! This is a hug free zone.  That is much different than a free hug zone!  No hugs allowed.”

Many times when I’m saying a students name I’ll place the wrong emphasis on the wrong syllable.  For example, I’ll pronounce “Harmony” as har-mone-ee. Just to change it up and get the kid’s attention.

Sometimes I’ll sing Disney songs in the hallway to students if it applies.  For example, fifth grade lost their recess for three weeks and had to sit doing writing assignments.  Their first day back on the playground, I started singing, “And for the first time in forever.”  Or if a kid is taking a long time at the drinking fountain…”I’ve been out here staring at the water…”  When we’re learning about shapes in first grade “It’s the circle of life”…when I hear two kids are dating “It’s beauty and the beast.” etc.

A lot of times I’ll change my voice inflection dramatically in the middle of a sentence along with my rate of speech.  So I’ll go from whispering to half-yelling and talking in slow-motion to talking really really quickly.

I’ll speak Spanish to my only English speaking kids just to confuse them and get them to look at me.

Sometimes when a kid says, “Excuse me!” I’ll reply, “That’s ok, I didn’t smell it.”

So as I read over this list, I realize that I must seem like a really crazy person to my students.  Strangely, I’ve come to be at peace with that. I think that it’s probably best that my students think I’m little bit crazy in the head.  It’s good for them to think that…or maybe that’s just me being crazy again.

 

Valentine’s Day

Valentine’s Day at an elementary school is always replete with drama.  As teachers, we don’t always know who’s dating whom and who just broke up with whom.  We get snippets and hear some of it but simply don’t have enough time to truly keep up with it.  Furthermore, I personally can say that I don’t really care.  Some of it is noteworthy so we know that Boy A can’t sit next to Boy B anymore because Boy B is now dating Boy A’s ex so they’ll fight.  Or we know that we can’t let Boy A go to the bathroom when Girl A is out of the room etc.  But most of it is just tertiary drama that really doesn’t affect us day to day.  However, on Valentine’s Day, we usually get doused with it.  Here are some funny anecdotes from the past couple years from Valentine’s Day.

The Manipulator

This is a pretty simple story really.  I was in first grade one year and saw one little girl get up in the middle of instructional time, waltz up to a young boy’s desk, and blatantly drop a note on his desk and hug him.  The boy, obviously taken aback at this unexpected amorous display looked helplessly up at me.  I just rolled my eyes and held out my hand.  The boy handed me note and I opened it up to read, “Dear Finky (Badly misspelled name), I love you.  I really do Finky. Love, (Girl’s name).”  Obviously I ribbed the boy to no end about it and to this day call him Finky.

However, the real punchline of the story comes later while I was at lunch duty.  As I was walking around the cafeteria helping the first and second graders open ketchup packets, (a task that is seemingly impossible for them to complete independently) the girl walked up to me and said, “Mr. Steidl, I have a secret.”  “Ok” I said. “I don’t really love (boy’s name). I just gave him that note to make you jealous.” She whispered.  “Ok.” I said, as I felt that any other response would be somehow inappropriate.  She then skipped away as if we’d never talked.

Cool Points for Mr. Steidl

Two of the teachers were sitting in the lounge on their planning period on one Valentine’s Day just discussing some of the drama.  “Oh gosh and then the whole thing with Bob and Jane (real names redacted to protect the somewhat innocent).” I heard them talking about how he forgot to get her a card for Valentine’s Day and how she loves Hershey’s Kisses and he came in eating Hershey’s Kisses but didn’t give her any for Valentine’s Day so she’s so mad at him.  Now Bob is an idiot.  I love the kid, but he’s an idiot, especially when it comes to girls.  However, we were making Valentine’s Day cards in my first grade group when he was on his lunch.  So I went to the cafeteria and called him out to the hallway. “Am I in trouble?” He asked as he walked up to me. “Well not with me.” I replied “But I hear that Jane isn’t too happy with you.” “Oh man. I know!” he said, and proceeded to give me the whole sob story about how he forgot.

I decided to help the young man out and asked him if he would like to bring his lunch to first grade and make a valentine for Jane there.  One of my students had also given me a giant Hershey Kiss that I was in no way going to eat so I offered it to him if he wanted it.  He said that yes he wanted to come up and make a valentine for Jane.  He worked diligently for about 15 minutes and then got up to leave.  “You want me to proof-read it?” I asked. “Yea that’d be good.” He replied and handed me the note.  I opened it up…

“Dear Jane,

HAHAHAHA Gotcha!  You thought I forgot for real didn’t you? Best joke ever right?  You know I would never actually forget about you.  I just wanted to make it better because it would be more of a surprise.  You know I love you.  I would say more than that but I think Mr. Steidl gonna read this.

Bob.”

It was just epic.  I never told Jane anything about how he actually did forget or that the huge Hershey Kiss she got was actually from a little girl named Adrianna.  That would be some major violation of bro code.  I’m pretty sure she knows anyways.  However, every time “Bob” sees me in the hall now, he kind of just gives me a nod and grins.  Cool points for Mr. Steidl.

Secrets Secrets – The Home Life

Sometimes kids tattle on their parents without really understanding what they’re doing.  There are times when students disclose to us serious things that happen in the home but other times it is much more lighthearted and funny.  The best of these stories come when the student has absolutely no idea what they’re actually telling us.  Other times they know what they’re saying and just don’t realize how much their parent doesn’t want us to hear it.  For example…

The Crying Baby

I was doing a reward lunch with a group of students.  These are always great because students just talk.  When they’re allowed to just talk, really funny things come out of their mouth.  This one student was talking about his siblings.  “Mr. Steidl, my little brother cries a lot.  Yesterday, my mom and her boyfriend went in to her bedroom because they had to find something in her closet.  They were in there for a long time looking and I had to watch my baby brother the whole time.  He was just crying and crying.” I didn’t ask if they found what they were looking for.

Those Red Lights Are the Worst

This time was right around Marin Luther King Jr. day.  We were talking about the impact that he had on our nation and how he was instrumental in changing some very unfair laws.  I was trying to explain to a group of first graders what the Jim Crow laws were.  One little girl raised her hand and just started talking.  “Mr. Steidl I know we have laws that are really really bad.  Like red lights.”  “Red lights?”  “Yeah you know like on the roads.”  “Yes.  I know what red lights are.  Why are they so bad?”  “Well my mom always says that the red lights make her late for work.”  “Yep.  Red lights are the worst for that aren’t they.”

Palabras Malas

We’ve had a few students this year that moved here from Puerto Rico after the hurricane.  These students obviously bring a whole set of new challenges with the language barrier and other factors.  It’s fascinating to watch them acclimate socially and begin to learn the language.  It’s funny to see which words they learn first from their peers.  One of the boys simply hardly talks at all even to me in Spanish.  So his teacher was very surprised when she heard him not only speak but say “Holy shit.”  So, we found ourselves having a discussion about language that is appropriate for school.  We usually get some kids say things like, “But my mom says that all the time.”  One time I remember a girl even looking at us and saying, “Um, have you met my step dad Jose?”  Well this particular time, when we were talking about swearing, one student raised her hand and said, “Mr. Steidl, my mom cusses about you all the time.”  “Really?” I replied.  “Yeah, she doesn’t like you very much.  She always calls you the B word and the F word.  She sometimes says the S word too when she talks about you.”  Well thank you.  That is very encouraging.   I’m sure she wants you to let me know.

 

Comparatives and Superlatives are the Most Worstest to Teach and Complicateder Than You Think.

So this blog post is where I nerd out and rant on the topic of comparatives and superlatives in the English language.  They’re just so much more complicated then other languages.  For those of you who aren’t as grammar-nerdy as me, comparatives and superlatives are when two or more nouns are compared based solely on their adherence to a single adjective.  For example, comparing to shoes based on their adherence to the adjective “small.”  You could compare two shoes by saying that one shoe is “smaller” than the other.  Or you could compare three or more shoes by saying that one shoe is “the smallest.”  So, smaller and smallest are the comparative and superlative forms of the adjective small.

Now, the simplest form of the rule for comparatives and superlatives for English is that you add -er to the end of the adjective for a comparative and -est to the end for the superlative form.  However, it’s not nearly as simple as all that.  Let me just take you through the journey that I’ve gone on with my students this year.

Day #1 – Adjectives

The first step in teaching comparatives and superlatives was learning what an adjective is.  Simple definition is that adjectives describe nouns.  They tell you something more about a noun.  Back to the shoe example.  What kind of shoe is it?  It is a small shoe.  The adjective simply tells you more about the noun.  Even this step is not as simple as it seems.  If the students coming in don’t have mastery of the concept of what a noun is, well then the whole lesson is shot.

Day #10ish – Intro to Comparatives and Superlatives

After about two weeks (10 school days) of rehashing nouns and then masteringish adjectives, we moved on to introducing comparatives.  Of course, the rule I taught was that you simply add -er or -est to the end of the adjective to make it comparative or superlative.  Pretty easy to check that box.  I put three pictures of trees on the board.  I tell them our adjective is “tall.”  So, the first tree is taller, the second tree is..pause waiting for student to answer..taller.  Exactly.  We simply add -er.  And the third tree is the..pause again..tallest.  Fantastic.  Simply throw a good old -est on it and here we go.

We repeated this exercise with different vehicles and the adjective “fast.”  Again, simple.  Simply add -er or -est.

Day #11ish – Words to double the final consonant

The next day, for our opener, I decided I would go off script a bit and let the students pick their own adjectives for the warm-up practice on comparatives and superlatives.  I gave them a pretty broad theme.  They had to choose three animals and compare them using the same adjectives.  Student A chose an elephant, a lion, and a bear.  He was using the adjective big.  So he wrote. “A lion is big.  A bear is biger.  The elephant is the bigest.”…pause.  Things just got a little complicated.  So we stopped and explained that sometimes, you have to double the last letter in the adjective before adding -er or -est.  The next few days were spent covering adjectives like big, wet, fit, flat, fat, thin, etc where you have to double the final consonant.  I was impressed.  Our students tried to analyze when to or not to double the final consonant.  They came up with words that end with t, n, and g.  I was ok with that until….

Day #14ish – Words that don’t double the final consonant

So on day 14, we were talking about animals again.  We decided to compare animals based on speed.  Student B wrote, “A deer is fast, a bear is fastter, but a cheetah is the fasttest.”….pause.  Things just got more complicated.  Now we have to spend a half hour talking about how if there are two consonants at the end of the word than you don’t double the last consonant anymore even if it’s g or t.  So long doesn’t turn into longger, fast into fastest, etc.  Also, if the final consonant is preceded by two consecutive vowels, you also do not double the last consonant…even if it is a g or t.  So sweet does not turn to sweetter nor does clean become cleannest.  So now, students not only have to look at the last letter of the word to determine whether or not to double the consonant but also have to look at the previous two letters.

Day #? – Words that end in vowels

Up until this point, we’ve only really dealt with adjectives that end in consonants.  So now, what do we do with words that end in vowels.  My students were comparing puppies and kittens and saying that they were cuteer and the cuteest. (Adding -er and -est to the end of words).  Ok. So the rule we had to teach next was that if an adjective already ended in an e, don’t add another e.  We’re good.

Day #LordHelpMe – Words that End in -y…mostly

So then there’s the letter y that is special in that it is sometimes a consonant and sometimes and vowel.  Well the next rule we had to teach was that if a letter ends in a y, you change the y to an i and then add -er or -est….except sometimes.  Like the word shy.  If you wanted to say one boy was more shy than the other you would still write that he was shyer.

So, just to count, we’re now on 5 different possible ways to change an adjective into a comparative or superlative.

Day #pleasemakeitstop – Syllable Counting

At this point I’m just about done with this.  However, now we get into longer adjectives.  As in adjectives that have more syllables.  Usually, if an adjective has either one or two syllables, you follow the above rules and add -er or -est in whatever form is required.  Then, usually, if it has more than two syllables, you simply add the words “more” or “the most” in front of the adjective.  So, if you wanted to to compare how complicated two situations were, you wouldn’t say one was complicateder than the other, you would say it was more complicated.  However, this is not a hard and fast rule.  Some adjectives follow the long adjective rule and some do not.  For example, the correct comparative form of the word sincere is sincerer.  On the other hand, the correct comparative of the word anxious is more anxious….And students are simply expected to know the difference because there is no way that we have time to learn every occurrence of each way.

So now we’re at six and kind of seven rules.

Day #I’mEndingThis

Finally, we got to the irregulars.  Adjectives that follow no rules when used as a comparative or superlative.  Luckily, at least half of the students in my class know these intuitively.  For example the adjective many.  It does not turn into manyer, or manier.  You wouldn’t say, “I made many writing errors but she made manier.” You would say “She made more and he made the most.”  Like I said, by the time students have made it to me, they usually know most of these implicitly…..  However, there are some, like me, that are badder than others at it and really struggle to get gooder at it even in adulthood. Happy grammaring everyone.

The Rose That Grew from Concrete

Did you hear about the rose that grew
from a crack in the concrete?
Proving nature’s law is wrong it
learned to walk with out having feet.
Funny it seems, but by keeping its dreams,
it learned to breathe fresh air.
Long live the rose that grew from concrete
when no one else ever cared.

   – Tupac Shakur –

For those of you who don’t know me, Tupac is one of my favorite artists of all time.  I find him to be not only one of the best lyricists and performers of all time but a simply fascinating human being.  Some of his music seems shallow.  It talks about the same stuff that much of the rap music of the time talked about; sex, drugs, women, guns, more women, more sex, liqour, punk police, etc.  But then there are songs like “Dear Mama,” a ballad to his mother, thanking her for all she did for him and telling her that now he can see how hard life was on her, especially because of him.  Songs like “Keep ya Head Up,” and “Changes,” that are honest social commentary of the day.  There are deeply passionate songs like “Life Goes On,” to fallen comrades.  If you explore the person that was and is Tupac Amaru Shakur, you’ll find that even his “thug life” phrase meant much more to him than what it seemed on the outside.

And then on a whole different level, is his book of poetry, The Rose That Grew from Concrete.  The poems in it are deeply introspective and full of raw emotion set to word.  As I read through it, each of the poems hits me on an emotional level because when I hear them, I picture my own students.  Their upbringings and home lives are so incredibly different from my own.  I could not possibly describe myself as a rose that grew from concrete but rather a rose that grew from a well fertilized and up-kept garden.

When I read the poem at the top of the page, I feel two different emotions mostly.  First, I feel hope.  I hope that, like that rose, my students all  prove nature’s laws wrong and learn to walk with no feet and breathe fresh air.  I hope that they blossom and escape lives of poverty.  I would like to think that what I am doing here is helping give them a chance to do that.  However, when I read the poem, I also feel a profound sadness knowing that this will not be the case with all of them.  I know that the rose that blossoms from a crack in the concrete is a rarity.  Statistics show that the majority of my students are being dealt a loaded hand.  The odds are not in their favor.

Now, I’ve been teaching long enough that I’ve had enough success stories to keep me going.  Students have come back to me to tell me about some of the things they’re accomplishing.  But I’ve also been teaching long enough to see the opposite as well.  Last year, I went to two students’ parents’ funeral.  It was a homicide/suicide.  Stuff like that tears me apart.  If I’m being honest, I’m much more of an empath than is healthy.  I try to push it aside and keep on, but it sticks with me.  I spend hours at night worrying about them (I haven’t seen either one since the funeral) and where they are now or will be in two years.  And I think how my first class of fifth grade students are soon to be juniors in high school and wonder how many are still in school and how many dropped out.  And then I worry about what their futures hold.

And then I stopped and thought about how to change this.  Like how can I make it less of a rarity to see a rose grow from a crack in the concrete?  It’s something I’ve thought about a lot ever since I first read the poem and I think I’ve got the answer.  The answer is to make more cracks in the concrete.  I need to work harder at breaking down environmental barriers that inhibit my students’ growth.  Provide more emotional support and a stable environment for them to flourish.  Manage my own temperament to provide an example of how to appropriately react in a crisis situation.  Try to remain encouraging in their failures even when it’s the hundredth time.  Be understanding of underlying circumstances that might be causing behaviors.  Be even keeled and fair in discipline.  Be more proactive to teach appropriate social interactions. Above all show them love even in the face of disrespect and defiance.  I know that sounds cheesy as all get out.  However, it’s the only thing that makes sense to me.  If roses will grow in cracks in the concrete, and we want roses to grow, crack the concrete.  So I’ll end this post with another of Tupac’s poems titled “And 2morrow.”  I think that it does a beautiful job of expressing the pain of today along with the hope for tomorrow.

 Today is filled with anger
fueled with hidden hate
scared of being outcast
afraid of common fate

Today is built on tragedies
which no one wants 2 face
nightmares 2 humanities
and morally disgraced

Tonight is filled with rage
violence in the air
children bred with ruthlessness
because no one at home cares

Tonight I lay my head down
but the pressure never stops
knawing at my sanity
content when I am dropped

But 2morrow I c change
a chance 2 build a new
Built on spirit intent of Heart
and ideals
based on truth

and tomorrow I wake with second wind
and strong because of pride
2 know I fought with all my heart 2 keep my
dream alive

Gas Leaks

Students at the elementary level have a lot of gas…like a lot a lot.  Thinking about it, it’s probably not that much more than middle or high school age, they simply don’t have the body control or the social acumen yet to realize when the proper times and where the proper locations are for releasing it.  Gas is something that all elementary teachers deal with on a daily basis, but there are three times I can remember that really stood out to me.

All names have been changed to protect the innocent…except Mr. Peters…that’s his actual name.

Mr. Peters and the Nuclear Fallout

Our janitor at the school is named Mr. Peters.  He is an elderly African American gentleman who quietly goes about the building.  When he is interacting with the students at the school, he is almost always gentle, kind, and patient.  I have really only seen one time in an interaction with a student when this was not the case.

We had a set of twins named Rick and Rob at the school.  I worked with both of them for the year that they were at the school.  However, one time stands out.  I had a group of eight students, Rob among them, working with me in the teachers’ lounge which doubled as my reading intervention room.  Rob was always gassy but today was on a different level.  The problem is that not only is it gross but it is also a huge distraction and time waster.  So finally, I said, “Listen, if you really have to do that, you don’t even have to ask me.  Just get up and walk into the hallway and come back.  Give it ten seconds to clear out before you start walking back though.” About five minutes later, Mr. Peters was walking down the hallway and stepped into the doorway of the lounge to ask me a question.  It just so happened that at that moment, Rob felt the urge.  So he jumped up out of his chair, ran to the doorway, stood right next to Mr. Peters, and let it rip.

The look of shock and horror on Mr. Peters face is something that I will never forget as long as I live.  It was the first, and the last time for that matter, that I ever heard him raise his voice at a student.  “WHAT ARE YOU DOING?” The shock on Mr. Peters face was matched by the shock on Rob’s face at hearing Mr. Peter’s shout.  “Well Mr. Steidl told me if I had to fart again that I should go into the hallway!” “WELL YOU DIDN’T HAVE TO STAND RIGHT NEXT TO ME WHEN YOU DID IT!” To this day, whenever the issue of a gassy student comes up in Mr. Peter’s presence, he just looks at me, shakes his head, and says, “There’ll never be one as bad as the twin.”

Dynamite Comes in Small Packages

It always amazes me that so much gas can come out of such small bodies.  I remember working with this tiny little first grade girl.  She probably weighed all of about 35 pounds.  We were working on letters and letter sounds in a group of probably five students.  She at least had the decency to do what she had to do silently.  But they were powerful.  The kind of powerful that leaves your eyes watering.  Every time it happened, the kids would all look around and then pull their shirts over their noses.  Finally, one boy said, “My God who is that?!?!” To which four of the students said, “Not me!!!!” The little girl looked straight at me with a pleading look on her face and said, “I can’t even lie, it’s been me the whole time.  I just can’t keep them in! I feel like I’m gonna float into the ceiling if I do!”

Don’t Drink the Water…well Milk Actually

My first year of teaching, I was working in our second grade classroom with a teacher named Ms. Dworkin.  We were both first year teachers working on figuring this whole teaching thing out.  I got into the classroom second period and stayed for two full periods which was a total of 90 minutes.  The classroom was on the basement floor of the school and for some reason was not equipped with any kind of fan.  The lack of air movement became most apparent right around 9:15 every morning.  The room would simply fill with this horrible stench that enveloped any and all living creatures within its confines.  In the fall, we mitigated it by opening windows and doors but once the Northeast Ohio winter hit, that became impossible.  I should have bought stock in Glade air fresheners in the fall because Ms. Dworkin and I would go through the classroom with one in each hand like Rooster Cogburn in True Grit just spraying fresh linen or lavender freshness on everything.  However the stench remained.  It was the kind of pervasive smell like when people smoke weed.  Like they spray cologne or Axe or Febreeze to try to cover it up but in the end just end up smelling like whatever they sprayed…and weed.

Ms. Dworkin and I simply could not figure out who the culprit was.  Until one day a student came into class with a note.  It read, “Please do not allow student to drink the milk at lunch.  He is very lactose intolerant and it gives him indigestion and gas.”  The light went on.  The next morning at breakfast I walked in to see this student with three empty cartons of chocolate milk in front of him. I said, “Woah woah woah, you can’t drink those! You know what they’ll do to you.”  He looked up at me and said, “I know but they’re sooooooo goooooood!”

 

This is Why Teachers Drink

I know it might be hard for you to picture your old third grade teacher Mrs. Schneider kicking back after school on Friday at the local watering hole with a cold beer, but the truth of the matter is that most teachers do drink.  Don’t judge too harshly.  It’s a stressful job no matter where you teach.  I’ve spoken with teachers in the suburbs, in rural areas, and in urban areas, and most of them agree that kids sometimes drive them to the bottle.  It’s not that we don’t enjoy our jobs or love the kids that we teach.  It’s just that sometimes a bit of the sauce helps to take the edge off at the end of the week.  Or the middle of the week….Or on a Monday night.  Whichever.

I’m not going to even get into the really rough stuff that we deal with such as calling Child Protective Services.  I also won’t talk about the simple day to day like constantly having to argue with 7 year olds.  On a side note, I’ve found that even when I’m at home, I just naturally say everything three times while increasing both the volume of my voice and the articulation of hard consonants with each consecutive repetition.  Just a habit I’ve developed because I assume no one hears and/or listens the first two times I say things.  So, for the purpose of the blog, I’ll just share a few examples of the day to day life that makes us run to the bottle.

Dominoes

Over the past three weeks especially, our first grade students have had several incidents in which one person has pushed another in line and they fell down like dominoes and there are five kids crying and holding their faces.  The mop up duty after these occurrences are particularly annoying because A) there are five kids crying, B) all the kids are angry, and C) there is never a way to definitively get to the initial push.  There’s never an answer to who pushed who first that caused the domino effect…until this past week.

Our first grade teacher and I have been concentrating more heavily on the class’ transition periods in the hall.  Walking to and from PE, music, lunch, etc. is from where half the problems of the day originate.  So Ms. North, the first grade teacher, walks at the front of the line, and I walk at the back.  We had arrived safely and without major incident at our destination and were lined up against the wall waiting for their Reading Enrichment teacher to call them into the classroom.  I was patrolling back and forth and saw one little boy lean forward and whisper into the girl’s ear in front of her.  I said, “Now what could have been so important that you just had to lean forward to talk to her in the hallway?”  Immediately his face dropped and he replied, “Nothing.”

The little girl rolled her eyes, shook her head, and said, “He told me to push him again.”…I paused a moment.  I said, “You’re going to have to repeat that.  I thought you said that he asked you to push him.”  “Yeah,” she said, “He asks people to push him so he can fall into other kids and make everybody fall down.”  I fixed an icy gaze on the boy and immediately the water works started.  “But no one got hurt yet today!” He yelled through tears.  And this is why teachers drink.  These are the things that waste our time.  We have to sort through crying children to find that one kid actually asks others to push him so that he can fall into others and knock everyone down.

Cocooning

So yes, I realize that the root of this word is most commonly used as a noun, as in the pupal casing that envelops most moths and caterpillars or other insect larvae.  However, I have started using it as a verb because of our students.  Our heating system at the school is very old.  It’s a boiler system and not a forced air system so it takes a little while to warm up in the morning.  Usually, I allow my students to keep their jackets on for the first 30-45 minutes of each day.  After that, the rooms are very warm and the students have to put their jackets in their lockers.  This makes it harder for the kleptomaniacs in the room to hide whatever markers, staplers, pencils, coffee mugs, etc. that they’re trying to steal. (Yes, I’ve had students try to steal all those things.  I once found a student with 17 highlighters stuffed into the pockets of his coat. Why?…great question.  I’m glad you asked and I wish I had an answer.)

However warm the classrooms may be, student still do this thing in which they tuck their arms and hands inside their shirts.  All in all, probably not a big deal until they need to write, or turn a page, or move, or do anything other than just sit there.  It then turns into them trying to stick just their hand out of the collar of their shirt and bend down to turn the page, or write, etc and then it is a problem.  It’s also simply a safety hazard when they have to move.  Students in the primary age have not yet mastered the simple art of walking, let alone walking in a line, or walking in a line up and down stairs.  They trip and fall a lot.  If you have never worked with 25 elementary age students in a group, you probably think I’m exaggerating.  Believe me I’m not.  So, if a student is cocooning and trips and falls, rather than using his hands to break his fall, he will use his face to do so.

Getting them to stop cocooning is a constant struggle.  You might think that it’s not a big deal.  However, every year that I’ve taught, I’ve had at least three instances of a student walking with his hands inside his shirt and tripping and falling.  However, from the months of October to May, I have no memory of a day in which I have not had to tell at least three students to get their hands out of their shirts.  And it’s always an argument.  And this is why teachers drink. (On a side note, students are allowed to wear sweaters with their uniforms.  I have actually bought students sweaters that they can wear and they refuse because they don’t like them.)

Target Practice and the Poop Bandit

For some reason, the boys bathroom at the school is always a huge problem.  For about a two year stretch, there was an unknown student that we began referring to as the Poop Bandit.  Although our boys’ bathroom is equipped with five or six perfectly working toilets, this child felt it more comfortable to defecate in the sink.  At least twice a month we would find turds in the sink of the boys bathroom.  We never found out who it was either.  If any other students knew who it was, none of them told us anything.It hasn’t happened at all this year though.  But this is why teachers, and janitors, drink.

Our boys bathroom is also equipped with a drain in the middle of the floor.  And although it also has about five or six perfectly good urinals, the boys find it fun to stand around the drain and see how far away they can get and still get it in the drain.  Obviously it’s a trial and error system so by definition they are going to eventually miss…and they miss a lot.  And this is why teachers drink.